Notes from Away

Upon returning for the holiday break, we hit the ground running at work. I’ve barely had moments to breathe and somedays found it hard to find time for lunch. This past week, it hit me hard. I’ve been feeling worn down and sick all week, but there was so much to get done, I couldn’t justify a sick day. 

Yesterday, I had one of those days were things fell into place and I was able to close out any pressing projects and get a start on things for Monday. So much so, I could take today off to recuperate. 

The little monster is enjoying an extra day of relaxing as she doesn’t like working so hard during the week. But I do hope that all the math, budgeting and problem solving I’ve done these past few weeks sinks in for her. I hated math as a kid - just the thought of it and I’d have a complete panic attack.  

Now, I am the math whiz of the department. All day long, I crunch numbers, analyze results and determine a new way to look at them.  I take small pride in my ability to look at a math problem now and know I can beat it into submission. I am  the one with power over the numbers, not the other way around. 

Sometimes it does take me a few hours to win, but I just keep plugging at it. I stare them down and try to think outside the box. It is even stranger to me when I can look at the end results of a problem and know something went wrong in the calculations. I wish I had this confidence when I was younger, but knowing how far I’ve come means even more to me. 

It is my hope that the little monster never fears a math or reading problem. That she tackles them with reckless abandon and no tears.

Mgal and I hit some more sales last week! Pottery Barn, Pottery Barn Kids, Baby Gap and Carters Outlet, holy cow what deals we recieved.

Mgal is also under constant attack from within by the baby. She has been very active recently and not letting Mgal forget she is there.  We are starting to see body parts pushing from the inside, a little unnerving in an Aliens way.

Watching today’s inauguration I couldn’t help but wonder what it really truly means for my child. Voting in November was the first time in my life I felt my vote mattered to someone other than me.

I believe Barack Obama is a good change for the US, but any and all change will take a lot of work by every America citizen. It can not be all on one man to change a nation.  I do hope he inspires many to be the change they want to see.

Apparently, I have the pregnancy glow. Unfortunately, I can’t see it. In fact, I often just feel blah about pregnancy. It is a long period of waiting and my body is changing in ways I can’t control. The weight gain has been tough to stomach since last year at this time, I was working on losing weight and getting into shape.  The scale reads a number I don’t like but my friends are nice enough to say I look like I barely gained weight. 

I do enjoy the time I get to spend with my child. Never again in my life will we be this close. Every time she moves, I smile.  I am getting to know her routine and what she likes and doesn’t like. 

It is fun finding things for the baby, especially now that we’ve found the cheap stores. She has a nice wardrobe and everything was on sale. It is also really nice to know my husband can shop for her clothes and items solo and I have no worries. Now that he gets baby sizing, he is a whiz.  

We need to get some of the bigger items, like the car seat but we haven’t settled on one. Nor have we settled on a stroller. Toolbox has claimed the stroller as his job to pick out - he decided it falls into the same category as a bike, which I have turned entirely over to him. 

Although I don’t enjoy the physical changes, but the emotional changes rock. I can’t wait to meet my daughter and start this more exciting chapter of our family.

Since the weekend, I have had a very active tenant. So active, we’ve decide to re-nickname her “Thumper”.  

Thanks to the most recent “storm of the century”, we were stuck indoors all day Saturday.  I’m not afraid of the snow, but Michigan’s inability to plow roads and the Michigan drivers inability to drive in any bad weather make me less willing to be out.  To entertain myself, I placed the remote on my belly and watched the baby kick it.  She can’t knock it out of place, but she can make it wobble.  And wobble it did…

According to my books, I crossed into six months in the past week.  It seems so much longer.

The snow started yesterday and hasn’t stopped since.  Toolbox has been out snowblowing twice today and it seems to make only a minimal impact.  We were supposed to go to a party this evening, but between the snow and a very active baby, we opted to stay home. 

The little monster has been kicking and punching all day with very few breaks. Each time I think she is napping, she starts her aerobatics again.  Luckily she is playing away from the bladder and diaphragm today (which is unusual for her). I do feel a bit like her punching bag but I guess she is entertaining herself.

The nursery is coming together. Friends of ours are lending us their crib, so Toolbox assembled it today. We found a bumper on sale at Pottery Barn, which eliminates a sewing project for me.  Pottery Barn was also the source of the nursery rug. We had fallen in love the rug months ago  but the price was a bit steep.  The post-Christmas/crappy economy sales made it affordable.  Now we are waiting for a piece of furniture to come back from our carpenter and to get the art work framed.

It is our goal to have as much done by March, so that the last few weeks are low stress and even lower work. That would allow us to focus on other things… like maybe finding a family friendly vintage VW to join the fleet.

After two weeks off of work, both the husband and I returned to the offices today. I enjoyed the change of pace from hanging out at home. It is a good thing that my next long break will include the company of a little one. 

We attended class one of the baptism prep for our church, although we will be having the baby baptized at the same church we were married in. Even though the baby doesn’t arrive for a few more months, I prefer getting things done early.  My husband simply prefers me being relaxed, so if it means doing things early, we tend to do it. 

The little one has been kicking and punching all evening so I am off to spend some time reading to her. She must be trying to tell me something as she isn’t usually this active.

While shopping with my wife earlier today I noticed some interesting sale pricing differences. Some items had drasticly different clearence prices than identical items. I am thinking they just have a random number generator set between a high and low price and it spits out price lables. I will not complain as long as I can find the least expensively priced item for my kid. If it means I am a bad parent for being a tightwad then sign me up!

This morning, I was informed I will be a bad mother. My response was “Oh well.”

My husband and I were at a regular gathering of car geeks in the area. When one of the men realized I was pregnant, he made a comment about me becoming a stay at home mother. I simply stated I was not intending to stay home and would continue my career after the baby was born. Apparently, this makes me a bad mother as “someone else will be raising your child.”

Excuse my language for a minute but “BS”. Someone will be watching our child during the day, but it is still my husband and my responsibility to raise our child. It is not daycare’s responsibility to teach our child life lessons, manners or the difference between right and wrong. Our child will not be at daycare every waking minute. Nor should I be made to feel guilty because I want to continue working. 

More than a few people have informed me that the minute my child is born, I will want to be a stay at home mother. There may be moments when I will wish I could stay home from work, but I believe there is value in a working mother and a working father.  Maybe at some point, my husband will stay home with our children, but we both feel I have invested a lot of time and money into my education and career. I want to get some payback.

I fully support another person’s decision to be a stay at home or a working mother. Everyone needs to make the choice best for them and their family. And if being a working mother removes me from “Mother of the Year”, well,  all I can say is “Oh well.”

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